Somebody...

Somebody said it takes about six weeks to get back to normal after you've had a baby...

Somebody doesn't know that once you're a mother, "normal," is history.

Somebody said you learn how to be a mother by instinct...

Somebody never took a three-year-old shopping.

Somebody said being a mother is boring ......

Somebody never rode in a car driven by a teenager with a driver's permit.

Somebody said if you're a "good" mother, your child will turn out good...

Somebody thinks a child comes with directions and a guarantee.

Somebody said "good" mothers never raise their voices...

Somebody never came out the back door just in time to see her child hit a golf ball through the neighbor's kitchen window.

Somebody said you don't need an education to be a mother.

Somebody never helped a fourth grader with her math.

Somebody said you can't love the third child as much as you love the first...

Somebody doesn't have three children.

Somebody said a mother can find all the answers to her child-rearing questions in the books ...

Somebody never had a child stuff beans up his nose or in his ears.

Somebody said the hardest part of being a mother is labor and delivery...

Somebody never watched her "baby" get on the bus for the first day of kindergarten or on a plane headed for military "boot camp."

Somebody said a mother can do her job with her eyes closed and one hand tied behind her back ...

Somebody never organized four giggling Brownies to sell cookies.

Somebody said a mother can stop worrying after her child gets married...

Somebody doesn't know that marriage adds a new son or daughter-in-law to a mother's heartstrings.

Somebody said a mother's job is done when her last child leaves home...

Somebody never had grandchildren.

Somebody said your mother knows you love her, so you don't need to tell her...

Somebody isn't a mother.

Happy Mother's Day to all Moms, most especially my own mother to whom I will be forever grateful for the love and support she gives everyday!

Just In Case You Were Curious

I look just like my Dad who, I might add, never takes a bad picture.

Found this in the archives...

...and thought I would re-post just because I think it is so cool! This is my Uncle's retirement video.

"Testing...1...2...3"

"There's a change of clothes in the bottom of your bag in case you get wet."

"Be careful and listen to all the rules...especially the ones the instructors tell you about during your lesson."

"Make sure you keep your money in it's designated spot...your cell phone too."

"Always make sure you are with someone...you know like the buddy system. Never ski alone."

"Remember you only have a specific amount of money and a couple of packed snacks. So if you eat all of your snacks on the way there and you get hungry on the way home, you won't have anything left to eat. Also, make sure you spend your money wisely!"

These comments (and probably a few more I am not remembering), were all made by me to Emily on the way to the school this morning. I had to drop her off bright and early (5:45) so she could catch the bus with student council and go on her first ever ski trip.

This was one of those, "Oh my God I am a Mom" moments and a "Oh my God I sound like my Mom" moments all rolled in to one.

In replaying this in my head, I wonder just how annoying I must have sounded to Emily. Probably very I am guessing.

When we pulled in to the parking lot she wanted to get out and walk to the bus by herself. I said, "C'mon let me just walk you to the bus." With a quick roll of the eyes she agreed and I did...so what if the bus was parked right in front of the school and I was parked in the front row. She boarded and was on her way.

She's home now and of course, she's fine. She didn't lose a single thing and only has one bruise from a fall in which her ski somehow ended up coming in to contact with her hip. She came home with no money (which was ok) and according to her account, she managed to spread it out and make it last.

I am wondering if she would have come home the same way if I didn't say any of what I said.

I don't often second guess myself when it comes to these types of things and I am not really doing that now either. Even if saying what I said only benefited me and had no bearing on her day at all, saying it made me feel better. I am sure, sometime way down the line (perhaps when she is having a moment like this with her own child) she will look back and realize my motivation was purely out of love and concern for her.

Still, I can totally relate to how difficult it can be being the oldest child and I told her that this morning. I explained how she was more than likely going to be the first to do many things and because she was the first, she would probably have to endure more of the parental worry and concern than her sisters. Of course the concern will be there for each child as the venture off in to independence but as most parents know, once one child does something and does it successfully, the nerves and concern lessen and each successive child will have to endure it less. She seemed to understand this.

It's during times like these that I am amazed by how life comes full circle. I could swear it was just the other day when I was having conversations like this with my own mother.

Life After Death Etc.

Julia has had many questions about where we go after we die, and about how we got here to begin with. I am sure this is related to the recent passing of Nana. I find Julia's take on this very interesting and wonder how she has come to some of the conclusions that she has.

Our conversation started this morning with her deciding that before we are born we are skeletons and when God decides it is time for us to come to earth, he gives us skin and all of our body parts. She asked how we "got" her and I explained to her that she was a special gift from God that he gave to us (way too early for her to be having the birds and the bees talk!). She said, "Yeah, and since you told me that you and Daddy aren't going to have any more kids that means that I made our family complete." I told her that she was right (and she really was right...I always knew after Katherine that we were "supposed" to have one more child and after Julia arrived, I knew the family was complete). She asked who was the first member of our family. I told her it started with Daddy and I and then came Emily, Katherine and her. I told her the next members of our family would be the kids that she and her sisters may have when they were adults. She exclaimed, "I call getting to feed and hold the baby!" Funny kid, considering the baby she was talking about could very well be her own! After some quiet time thinking about all of this she asked, "Mom, after we all die and then come back to this planet, will I need to go to preschool again?" Apparently, she believes in reincarnation! She also very logical, thinking that when we come back we must start over again from the beginning.

Anyway, it was interesting, hearing her views about all of this.

Ongoing Project

I recently decided that I wanted a hard copy of every blog entry I have ever written. I have had two incarnations of this blog on other sites, plus various other topical blogs which I have had over the years. My introduction to blogging was in 2002, back when Katherine was just three years old and Emily was five. Most entries have been personal in nature. I have really gotten so much out of using this medium to share with the world my thoughts. There has always been this fear however, that all of this time and effort (and the story of my life for the past 8 years) would be lost, should there be some major crash of the world wide web. I know it's a silly kind of fear but one never knows. I have copied and pasted every entry from my first blog, and am halfway through the second. I haven't yet touched this blog, or any of the other topical type blogs mentioned. The document is 238 pages long. I have written a book length story of my life so far, and have more to go.

Something about this amazes me. I am looking forward to one day passing this story (in hard copy form) on through the generations of my family. What a treasure it will truly be.

Nomination

I recently nominated my mother for free spa services for a contest a local spa is having. If anyone deserves to be pampered, it's my mom. Below is the paragraph I sent:

My mother is not only a fantastic mother, but in my Nana’s last days she proved what a wonderful daughter she is as well. When Nana was diagnosed with esophageal cancer in October, my mother, without hesitation, invited Nana to live with her and my father while undergoing treatment. She took my Nana to countless appointments, made many phone calls, and arranged for her every need while she was living with her. She went above and beyond the call of duty as well; giving Nana massages, pedicures, and facials. When Nana had to go to the hospital, and eventually a rehabilitation center, my mother visited her daily. She made sure Nana had everything she needed physically (bringing her things from home) and emotionally (providing support and a presence, even at the end when Nana’s communication was limited). When it became clear that Nana was not going to make it, my mother went to the rehabilitation center and stayed with her for almost a week; barely leaving her bedside until her last breath. I am in awe of my mother and her loving dedication she has shown to my family, my sisters, my father and in her last days, my Nana.

I am really looking forward to the day...

...when I don't cry at the drop of a hat. Seriously, between Nana's passing and Ryun's work situation going from bad to worse, it has taken nothing (and more so than usual) for the tears to flow.

Like for example today...when I got Julia's progress notes for her IEP. Not something to cry over really (especially considering the progress she has made has been amazing) but I did. Why? Because a couple of small things are still works in progress like her ability to answer "wh" questions, her need for encouragement and examples beyond what would be considered the norm, and some continuing struggles socially. Still? I don't generally cry over these things.

I am so overwhelmed with what I have to do (in part because I did nothing last week except for what was necessary to remain, well, alive). I spent almost every waking minute in the rehab/nursing home with my Nana, mother, sisters and aunt experiencing what was probably the saddest, but most emotionally bonding time of my entire life. I wouldn't trade a singles minute of the time I spent there, but you know what they say about payback. I have so much to do, I don't even know where to start. I cry just thinking about the list. No, literally, cry.

My stomach has this huge, empty, yet full of tension and nerves spot that just doesn't seem to have subsided much, if at all.

Clearly, the first thing on the to do list needs to be some action steps that I can take to settle myself down and just let myself be. I am going to start tonight by heading to bed with the ipod and my classical music playlist. Hopefully, sleep will come quickly and with ease.

Let It Snow!

I won't be saying that in, say late February or March, but for right now, bring it on. The part that I love the most isn't the snow itself. It's the part that forces us to stay home and just be here, together and (hopefully!) enjoying each others company. Sometimes, with the hustle and bustle of everyday life, times like this are far and few between. So, when something comes along that forces this, it's always welcome in my book.

Sadly, depending on how bad it is, it may mean missing a family party tomorrow. It's not scheduled to start until late afternoon so if we are shoveled out and the worst of it has passed, then we may still make it. I am kind of sad about the possibility of missing it, but if we do, I will be looking forward to a day at home, frolicking in the snow with the kids, and, of course taking pictures.

On the agenda today after Katherine's basketball game? Cinnamon-Applesauce ornaments. Christmas music. Sugar cookie baking. Christmas crafting. Homemade mac n' cheese. Christmas movies.

I live for days like this.

Foliage

I spent Columbus Day weekend with my sisters in North Andover. On Saturday, we took a drive through Peterborough, NH. This is some of what we saw.

Thankful

I have many reasons to be thankful.

Slacker

I haven't updated here in a week! WOW! I doubt it's a record for me, given vacations and whatnot but it certainly is longer than I like to go regardless.

Life has just been busy. Not unusually so, but sometimes, when there is down time, I am just too tired or have other things in mind that I want to do, like catch on recorded tv or read. It seems like I have been doing both in marathon sessions, rather than just a bit at a time.

This weekend, in particular has been and will continue to be busy. Yesterday we had trick or treating with the kids. We went to the old neighborhood as usual, and met up with the Ryan family. Ryun's sister and her family walked with us for a while as well, which was nice. Speaking of being busy, we don't seem them as often as we should/want to for that reason alone, so when we do, it's a good thing. Tonight is the big Halloween party we have every year. This year marks 10 years since the first one, so I plan on making it memorable...which of course they all are. It seems like we will have a good turnout which is nice. Tomorrow we are heading to my parents house for my nephew Jack's third birthday. How the heck he managed to go from being born to three so fast I have no idea...kids have a funny way of speeding up time.

Anyway, I am hoping to keep up here a little better than I have been. We'll see what happens.

And in the "Holy Crap" Department we have...

...my kids starting school on Wednesday.

Oddly, I am about as "unready" emotionally for this as I could possibly be. I have no idea why really, except, that this summer, more so than others, I have really enjoyed the time I have spent with the kids. Of course, every summer with them has been enjoyable, but, this summer...was somehow more enjoyable than usual, and for no real apparent reason. I can't remember ever feeling this "blah" about it.

We spent the day down by the water today, and that helped to take the edge off a bit. It also helped to increase the dread that winter will be upon us before we know it and trips to the water will be no more. Ugh.

It was difficult...

...but I have managed to pick out 25 of the 220 picture I took while on the Cape and marked them as my favorite. They will be grouped in to the following categories; scenic (two sets) people (2 sets) and art (1 set). I will be posting them here, in groups of five over the next hour or so.

Enjoy!

Tragic

This was a cousin of my mother's.

UPDATED with a working link!

Busy Weekend=No Blogging

Busy for sure, but fun nonetheless. On Friday afternoon, we went over to my parents to swim with Jack and Suzanne. It was fun, and as usual, Jack and Julia were so cute together. We came home Friday night and, I stayed up way too late watching recorded tv.

On Saturday we had a birthday party to go to which was nice, although I did have to spend the first 45 minutes or so following Julia around because she refused to go play with the other kids by herself. She warmed up though after a while and was fine. We ended up being invited back to my parents to swim for a couple of hours after the party. It would have been a waste to go all the way home to get suits though, so I told the kids they could swim in their clothes. I might have earned the "coolest mom ever" award, but I can't be sure. It was all good, until we got there, and Julia refused to go in the pool without me. Thankfully, my sister Heather had two suits with her, so I borrowed one and Julia went in. She let me hold her in the water for a few minutes, but then retreated to her usual spot on the stairs and that was that.

Somewhere, between Saturday and Sunday (when we went back to the pool for the day) Julia decided that not only would she let me hold her in the water, but that she would swim by herself all over the shallow end and what the heck, jump off of the side without anyone catching her. It was like a switch in her head flipped, and she suddenly gained the confidence to know that not only could she do it, but that we would all be "right there" if she needed anything. You could tell how physically hard it was for her, but she kept right on going, pausing only to snack and go to the bathroom. It's hard to put in to words how proud I was of her. I will be anxious to see how she does when we go to a pool party on the 4th, not at my parents house and with people there that she knows only vaguely or not at all.

I am not sure what will be going on for week. Tomorrow is my turn to water the garden in the outdoor classroom at the Goode School and I think after that we will run errands. Beyond that? I don't know. But hey, it's summer? We don't need to have a plan now, do we?

Book Signing At School

Last week, Jeff Kinney was at The Burkland School as part of the PTA sponsored Scholastic Book Fair Family Night. The kids were super-excited to meet him. He did a wonderful presentation and then signed copies of his books. I have almost finished the first one myself (after his presentation I thought it might be fun for Em and I to read it at the same time) and am looking forward to the second. It was a great family night, and I was the official PTA photographer.

Here's a shot of Emily and Katherine with Mr. Kinney.

Re-Posting An Old Entry...Again

...for reasons which should be fairly obvious.

Annoying...when someone calls my house and doesn't leave a message. I have an answering machine for a reason. You called me so you must have something to say. So you know, say it. If I have a message, I will return it, but if you call and don't leave one, I am not going to bother calling you back. REPEAT: NO MESSAGE FROM YOU MEANS NO CALL BACK FROM ME.

Even more annoying...when someone calls once, doesn't get an answer, doesn't leave a message and then continues to call repeatedly...and still doesn't leave a message. Obviously I am either not here, busy, or plain and simple don't feel like talking on the phone. Again, I have a machine for a reason.

And just in case we're not clear on what the reason is...its purpose is to take messages, so that I can hear them and respond accordingly.

Uncle Ed's Retirement Video

This is the retirement video the folks down in D.C. made for my Uncle when he recently retired as the President of the Building Trades Division of the AFL-CIO. After Emily saw this she said, "Mom, don't you think he should run for President? I mean sure, he wouldn't be the "first" of anything (first woman etc.) but he has some really good ideas." Speaking of running for President, I think his political persuasions will become obvious as you watch this video (although mentioning that he retired from the AFL-CIO probably tells you a lot to begin with). There is one picture of him with the current President though!

Weekend

We had a busy one. On Saturday Ryun and I had a wedding to go to. Not surprisingly, it was a great time (because getting together with old friends from the neighborhood always means a great time). Yesterday we took the kids to the mall where they were having a kids expo. We saw a clown show, got some free toys and trinkets and Emily and Katherine got their hair done fancy by a local salon that was there. After that we went over to my parents for a family dinner in honor of my father's 58th birthday, which is today (Happy Birthday, Dad!). For whatever reason the weekend wiped me out so I came home and after getting the kids settled in bed, went to bed myself. I had plans to have a nice heartwarming night of television watching Extreme Home Makeover: Home Edition and Oprah's new show called Oprah's Big Give. Instead I watched it this morning over breakfast. I LOVE Sunday night tv already with just Extreme and after watching The Big Give, I can tell I am going to love it even more. Nothing like getting in a good cry every once in a while!