Everyone who is a regular reader here knows that Emily has ADHD, inattentive type, and that she is on a 504 Plan at school.
Most of the time (at least this year) I have felt that the school and her teacher were doing everything they could to help Emily succeed. A couple of things, with her teacher specifically, have happened over the past month or so that have me very concerned.
A few weeks ago, Emily's class was in the Media Center. The librarian was working with the students while Emily's classroom teacher sat in the back, correcting papers. She called Emily to the back of the room, showed her a reading comp page that she had gotten 65% on and said, "If you keep turning in garbage like this, I bet you'll fail the MCAS(the MCAS is a standardized test administered to children in grades 3-10 in MA)."
I'm sorry, what? Did you really just tell my kid that your betting she'll fail the MCAS? What the hell kind of teacher says something like that?
Just to give a little background: Emily went through this phase about a month ago in which she would pass in reading papers that were not up to her usual standards...she was getting 65-70 % on all of them, and it was fairly obvious, at least to me that she wasnt paying attention, and as a result didn't do her best work. She appears to be going along fine again...and is back to getting all A's on her reading papers.
The most recent thing happened today. Someone told on Emily for turning around when she was supposed to be looking at the front of the classroom. The girl said something like, "Emily needs to stop turning around." The teacher's response (said in front of the whole classroom), "That would be an impossible task for Emily to complete (as in it would be impossible for Emily not to turn around)."
Ok, first let's start with how she humiliated my daughter in front of the whole classroom. Seriously, was that neccesary? And talk about having little or no fatih in Emily...if Emily thinks that her teacher feels she couldn't do it, does anyone really think Emily will think she can? I'm sorry but you know what, her teacher was wrong...BIGTIME.
I plan on scheduling a meeting. I am not going to go in there acting like Emily's an angel and the teacher sucks. I know damn well Emily wasn't paying attention when it came to those reasing assignments, and I have no doubt she was turning around when she wasn't supposed to. I just think the teacher handled both situations completelly wrong.
I think I have said here before that Emily is not the kind of student that can just sit in a classroom, do what she is supposed to do and leave. She is a lot of work. You need to be right on top of her so that she'll stay on task, remind her to bring her stuff home, transition her from one activity to the next, etc. So, I am thinking her teacher may be getting tired of her and all of the extra things Emily needs.
I am not justifying her behavior in any way. She was wrong and I have no doubt about that. I am hoping that a meeting with her will pull her back in and get her to act and speak in a more appropriate way when dealing with Emily.
Conveniently, Emily's 504 is up for review at the end of March. I am thinking that I should include something like, "When Emily isn't paying attention, or is behaving inappropriately in the classroom, please remind her in a gentle yet firm manner that she needs to pay attention and follow the classroom rules."
Ugh...
I hate confrontation...actually I dread it. I am such a "Don't rock the boat" kinda gal, but, when your a messing with my child, you'd better believe I'll get over my fears pretty quick.
Just be nice. Set up a meeting and tell her what Emily has been saying. Ask her what went on. Hear out her side. It's possible that Emily misunderstood (not likely), but give her the chance to explain, especially as things seem to have been ok until recently.
ReplyDeleteTell her that you understand that things get tense in the classroom, and that dealing with Emily can be exasperating, especially in the context of 30 other kids, but that EMILY doesn't understand that, and that these off the cuff remarks are more hurtful than helpful to a kid like her.
If she doesn't come around, go for the administration.
As you know, my DH is a teacher, and he gets blamed for a lot of things that aren't his fault, because most parents automatically assume that their kids couldn't possibly act up or forget to do their HW. But he does appreciate when a parent gives him a chance to explain his side and try to work out a plan to move forward with. I hope you give this teacher a chance.
Yeah, I do plan on giving her a chance. It's funny. I told Emily that I was going to be talking to her teacher (as a way for her to make sure she was telling me the whole truth, not making anything up, and honestly, I wouldn't put it past Emily to make it up) and she swears up and down that it went just like she said it did. I am still going to go in to the meeting with an open mind though...find out the teacher's side and then take it from there. I am sure, just like everyone else in the world has them, the teacher was just having a bad couple of day or whatever. And, as I said, Emily is a lot of "work." I have no doubt that Emily did the things the teacher was upset about (turning around, not paying attention to her work etc) so I definitely don't plan on going in there acting like there is no way Emily did these things etc. I just think the situation could have been handled better. I am sure it will work out fine and all in all I am not to worried about it, just think it needs to be adressed so we can figure something out for the future.
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