Literal Thinking Etc.

When discussing Dr. Martin Luther King at school a couple of months ago, one of the parent volunteers asked Julia what she thought Dr. King's dream was. Julia pondered the question for a minute and answered, "I bet his dream was that he was white...then he never would have gotten shot."

This is how Julia thinks. Literally, logically and in a very distinct black and white pattern (no pun intended). There is no gray area for her. There are many examples of this...like when she walks down to the art room at the MECC, and refuses to say hi to her old preschool teacher or pop her head into her old classroom. You see preschool is part of her past. That part of her life is over so she has no connection to it any longer. Or the time I told her I was going to kill two birds with one stone while running multiple errands and she thought I was going to kill a bird. Then there was the time at school when she went to the girls room and found the toilet seat up (she must have been the first one in there after they had cleaned or something) and declared (again with the logic) that there must have been a "Daddy" in the building. There is of course the time she told her bus driver that because of Rosa Parks and Dr. King, she could sit wherever she wants on the bus and didn't have to sit in the front anymore.

She also speaks her mind...no matter what it is. Recently at a basketball game there were some young kids playing next to us with no parent close by. They were being a little rambunctious and Julia said to them, "Do you have a mother or what?" clearly trying to tell the kids that their mother (or even just an adult) should be there to tell them to stop being so wild. There was also the time when we were sitting in a restaurant and a gentlemen in the booth across from us took his glasses off to read the paper. She asked him quite loudly why he didn't just put his glasses back on so he could see what he was reading. A couple of weeks ago, a boy in her class had been out sick for a few days, came back to school and was hyper and bouncing off of the walls. She told him if he was going to behave that way then he should have just stayed home. The other day at the playground, a couple of teenage girls brought their younger brother with them and she told them they couldn't play there because the playground was only for little kids and they were too big. These examples aren't all that bad considering her age (5), but she is right at that line though where it goes from being cute and funny to inappropriate and rude. The difference between my other kids at that age is that if Emily and Katherine had said something like any of the examples above at the age of 5, I wouldn't have had any doubt that they would have known they were not being appropriate and would have understood when I explained that to them. Julia does not get it.

Socially, Julia interacts with adults much more frequently and comfortably then she does with her peers. She will play along side peers, but not often with her peers. She doesn't stay on topic unless she is continually reminded to do so and often won't initiate conversations without prompting.

Academically, she is a math whiz. She enjoys math...counting, patterns and sequencing are easy for her to grasp (not surprising considering the logic and literal thinking involved in math). English Language Arts is a bit more difficult for her. She struggles a bit with reading, communicating and retelling stories, and the appropriate use of social language. Considering everything I have just said, this too seems to make sense to me.

Julia also tires very easily...both physically and mentally. Maintaining focus for her isn't just a matter of concentrating harder...some tasks are just too much for her. Physically, she tires a lot easier than other typical kids her age might. Her tone is low so she has to work a lot harder to achieve some of the physical milestones that other children achieve easily or with little effort.

All of this? Is why she is staying back. It is also why I think she will some day soon be diagnosed with Asperger's or some type of "spectrum disorder." It's not like a diagnosis really matters as long as she gets the help and services she needs. I don't know if this makes me sound awful, but sometimes, I think my life and hers might just be easier if we had some sort of "excuse" or "reason" for how she perceives and interacts with the world. One thing I know for sure? I wouldn't change a thing about her. All of this is what makes her so unique and special, and while sometimes, I wish she didn't have such a struggle, I can't imagine the victories being as sweet as they are.

So...

...since getting laid off on Thursday, Ryun has been the happiest I have seen him a long time. This doesn't make sense when you look at just the fact that he was laid off but, when you take in to account the fact that he no longer has to go to work in that volatile situation, it makes complete sense. Maybe, just maybe, this being laid off thing will turn out to be a blessing in disguise.

La La La La La La La La La La La

My week so far: Service engine light came on in the van, hurt my finger doing I have no idea what and it's all swollen and black and blue, found out that Julia will be repeating Kindergarten(which is a. not surprising, b. probably the best choice I could have made for her, and c. totally fine but it's still just...hard to explain my feelings around this honestly), found out that unless a miracle of God is performed Ryun will be out of a job, um, tomorrow.

I really have so much to say about this that I don't even know what to say (imagine that...me, speechless). So, instead of crying to you all I am going to share with you the new theme song I am trying to adapt to my life.




Ahh...leave it to an 80's tv show to help make me feel better! : )

Being Mom

Sometimes, I have no idea what I am doing when it comes to raising my (almost) teen aged daughter.

Has anyone else ever looked in the mirror or replayed a conversation in your head and wondered afterward if alien forces had somehow invaded and somehow made you say what you said? Or wondered if alien forces had invaded your child and done the same thing? I seem to be having moments like these more often than not. I can't tell you how many times I have said to myself, "Did that really just happen?"

Someone once told me that ages 12-14 were the worst age bracket in regard to mother/daughter relationships. I am beginning to see why that's true. Clearly, I can't do or say anything right. I am also being nosy and overbearing when offering my help in a situation in which she is clearly struggling (no matter that she said she wanted my help to begin with).

I am having a hard time letting go. She is having a hard time remembering that a little more independence comes with age but, some of that independence must be earned. Why do kids want to grow up so fast? Sometimes, being an adult is not all it's cracked up to be. You can trust me on this.

It's hard, despite the moments of joy that I found in raising my oldest daughter, not to long for the days when I was all she ever needed and, I could do no wrong.

And I Thought Last Week Was Busy...

Monday: Work in the morning, volunteer in the afternoon, dance for Emily at 6, FINCOM meeting at 7.

Tuesday: Work in the morning, hold signs near MECC at 5:30, Julia's PT conference at 7, then to an override meeting immediately afterward.

Wednesday: Happy St Patrick's Day! Work in the morning, Em staying after school for student/faculty bball game, conference call at 7.

Thursday: Work in the morning, Show at the MECC in the afternoon, Ryun's on call, Dance for Katherine, Olympics meeting at 7.

Friday: Work in the morning, dinner at my parents at night.

Saturday: Dance for Julia, holding signs for the morning.

My Thoughts On Supporting Public Education...

...conveniently written by someone else here. This could not describe my feelings regarding the support of public education any better than if I had written it by myself.

My Thoughts On MCAS

The Massachusetts Comprehensive Assessment System (MCAS) is a statewide standardized test administered to students beginning in third grade. Students, in varying grades are tested in English Language Arts, Mathematics, Science and Technology/Engineering, History and Social Sciences. Students are required to pass grade 10 MCAS test in English Language Arts and Mathematics, and, beginning with the class of 2010, one high school test in Biology, Chemistry, Introductory Physics or Technology/Engineering in order to graduate high school and be awarded a diploma. There are many different kinds of questions on the MCAS including open response, short answer and multiple choices.
I believe MCAS is a good tool for measuring progress, seeing what areas of student learning need improvement, and assessing individual needs of various student groups. I also believe open response questions, which ask the students to write their response for a question in a paragraph and, to defend their response with material from a text, provide the opportunity to develop much needed critical thinking skills.
I firmly believe that no single test should be the determining factor in whether or not a student earns a high school diploma. No student’s knowledge and skills can or should be summed up by one single test score. There are students that may not test well, but can, in other ways (such as a portfolio of their work) demonstrate appropriate knowledge of a subject. Students in schools that have higher class sizes, limited or no access to educational resources, and fewer qualified teachers will also suffer due to circumstances out of their control.
MCAS should continue to be used as an assessment tool. Accountability is needed and schools and students need to be held responsible. However, denying a student their right to a high school diploma based on a single test score is not appropriate. Other measures, including portfolios of student work should be considered.